Tuesday, September 14
headphones
WTF MY SENNHEISERS DIED AFTER 5 MONTHS. I was too lazy to send in the 2 year warranty, so I'm getting new Klipsch Image S4s. Apparently they sound amazing.
I just hope I get used to earphones instead of headphones. I hate earphones because I feel like my ears are raped all the time. Please ears, please get used to ear rape T_T
For now I'm using abby's startrek headphones which make me look like I'm some space rocket captain. Please arrive soon earphones.
remind me why I want to get out of here?
My class is made up of people who take Computing and Physics.
Being a lit student all the while I've never been able to fit into it, I tried at first, only to get looked down on, hurt, betrayed, badmouthed, ostracized and everything you can possibly think of I have gone through with this class. No one will ever know what I went through at the start of the year. The sad thing is, I can forgive for a while, but soon I'll start bearing grudges again. I cannot let go of bad things that people have done to me. It's hard to forgive forever. Being an antisocial loser only made everybody do those things to me, so I cannot blame them because I admit I wasn't likeable. I admit. It isn't really their fault. Still, I didn't deserve much of the way I was treated.
Being in this class is extremely depressing and I very, very badly want to leave.
Today, one of my classmates taking physics asked the computing students:
Hey does anyone know who is the LAST IN COMPUTING?
I'm very INTERESTED TO KNOW.
Cause it's like, everyone get a A, then like AAAAAAAAAA then one person get E.
Translation:
WOW WHO IS THAT RETARD WHO IS SO STUPID TO FLUNK AN EASY SUBJECT WHICH EVERYBODY GOT A? COME, POINT YOURSELF OUT TO ME SO THAT I CAN LOOK DOWN ON YOU.
...
...
Wow. That was hurtful.
I'm flabbergasted.
True, I never pay attention in class, I sleep and meow in class and if I don't I am distracting my friends such that my teacher gave me permission to skip her classes, I have never done a single tutorial and I don't program and I never did homework or studied. I don't even know where we are for computing and promos are in 2 weeks. I still have more than 25 tutorials and assignments to do. From the first lesson.
I deserve to be last in class for computing.
But do you know how it feels when someone says that to you? Do you know how it feels to be the last in computing when last year everybody regarded you as a computer pro and asked you to solve their computer problems - Oh you don't know how bad it feels because you've never been last. You've never felt depressed trying to study.
If you were to be given a list of grades, and you purposely look for the lousiest grade and at who's last (just to feel better about yourself cause you can look down on the last in class) it's okay. It's perfectly acceptable to be human. It's normal Singaporean behavior.
But saying it out loud to all of us, about a subject that you don't even take?
Remind me why I want to leave this place?
I really hope I can take study leave for the whole of next year.
Because right now I am sick of them.
P.S. I still love a lot of you guys.
P.P.S. If I take study leave I'll just attend computing and lectures. I love the computing people. I REALLY love the computing teacher and I'm awed at how people like my mom can be married and terribly nice people with not a single drop of evil in them like my computing teacher stay single. Sigh.
exams
As for exams, I think I may fail. I haven't been working hard but I just don't want to study anymore. But I have to or my papa will be sad. Ugh. I don't deserve to spend his money.
Driving theory on thursday. During chemistry. FML
LMAO
Mark: *some hokkien words*
Abby: Are you speaking hokkien?
Me: *
shouts across canteen bench* Did you just say cheebye?
Mark: Did you just call me a cheebye? WHY? WHAT DID I DO TO OFFEND YOU?
LMAO
Labels: fuck you, headphones
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