Tuesday, January 13
Ugh #1
Today, I found out '
Mushy' is 'vagina' in German (
muschi, same pronunciation).
German friends, why did you not tell me I was calling myself a vagina all along???
or did you not want to break my heart
:(
Ugh #2
I finally thought of a name for my webcomic:
catbeans
^w^
Referring to the soft pink toes on the underside of a cat's paws.
So cute right?!
But then:
Cat Beans refers to a certain strain of Marijuana grown strictly in Northeast Iowa. The Term comes from the fact that it is grown in a litter box. It is said to be very potent.
DAFUQ BRO
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS
uguhggjdashgfjasfgdhagfjsd
SCREW WEED
Ugh #3
So I got a new laptop which, together with my phone,
I bought with my own earnings (
omfg omfg omfg musho you're all grown up now)
...BUT because it's fucking Win 8.1 there were a ton of bugs, one which even the Asus repair center couldn't solve. I tried to fix them the best I could and edited stuff deep inside the system I never had to edit before but the problem still persisted.
Only solution is a factory reset that wipes all the data.
Fuck this, 3 days spent on installing all my programs and customizing my laptop (I'm a customization freak) and wasted!!!
Well, at least I know how to update my BIOS now.
Ugh #4
Weird rant, pls ignore
It was disconcerting to have so many people screw me over in the few short weeks. I didn't tell anyone but I just couldn't take it anymore. So I ranted to my bf everything I was upset about, spent one night crying, thought over things. I will be ok, as long as I have my bf, who has never let me down.
Over these years there were friends, friends who I went through lots of shit together with, friends who were there for me, friends who I was there for, friends I thought I would witness get married and witness me get married. Friends I never knew I had to cut off.
It's so hard to trust people now that I'd rather not. I am scared the next person I talk to will be the next person who disappoints me.
But there is a need to acknowledge the over-sensitive side of myself. I need to learn to take things less personally.
My bf said that even though my friends might behave in a way I did not expect, it doesn't mean they don't care. They find other ways even if they don't treat me the way I treat them. I will take that into consideration, but things really have changed.
My bf also said he doesn't expect things of people. But isn't it human nature to predict reactions and behavior? If so, you'd either expect to be secure or to be disappointed. And I want people I can put faith in, people I can feel secure with. I don't want to expect disappointment.
Ugh #5
I've been sick coughing for over a month and went to do a lung xray and honestly the film doesn't look good. I have to wait 5 days to see the report.
But I've been on medication for weeks and I'm still not getting better and it hasn't happened before. I hope I'll be alright.
At least I know my bf will drop everything and come back to me if I only have one year left to live, so I got that goin' for me
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